Episode 110: I Love You, Now Die

I love you, Doccalo. I love you so do everything I tell you. 1) subscribe to this podcast 2) recommend this podcast 3) listen to this podcast and 4) LIVE! LIVE FOREVER! Angela and Bob hit up a “True Crime” documentary and revisit the director Erin Lee Carr who you might remember directed “Mommy Dead and Dearest” which we covered waaaaaaaaaaay back early in the bad audio era of the show. A severely depressed young man by the name of Conrad Roy III was found to have taken his own life in his truck outside of a K-Mart. Police later discovered an intense exchange of thousands of text with a girl named Michelle Carter. Suddenly, she is charged with a crime. We’re shooting the shit on the 2-part docuseries “I Love You, Now Die”. Did eyebrows really talk Conrad into taking his own life, or was Conrad just fulfilling a destiny he had long set out for himself? If someone told you to jump off of the Fish Island bridge and you did it, is that person is responsible? Also…what does that lady in the Patriots windbreaker think about it? You can watch this jazz on HBO. You probably have your aunt’s password. Use it. Then get your docs off. Then Keep on Doccin’

The trailer.

Taunton. It’s wicked.

Your drunk uncle made this.

Perfectly normal.

Shorties 41: Weber Cooks Creamed Corn and Potatoes

Chef Steven Reed is struttin’ from his viral fame. Now he tests us with a dish we hope you don’t insist that we try. Two great American veggies: corn and potatoes. How does Steven throw down with this and a microwave? Behold the heat immunity of his mighty hands. Felicia and Bob break down “Weber Cooks Creamed Corn and Potatoes” and there’s no sign of salt. But there’s plenty of what the kids call “big dick energy” going on. Keep on Doccin’

Weber Cooks Creamed Corn and Potatoes.

Ke$ha is into him too.

GOAT.

Episode 109: Hello, Privilege. It’s me, Chelsea

Ready to get your docs off? This week Akil and Bob sit down with a Netflix doc featuring a successful comedian who wants to get down to the very core of what she is…privileged. Chelsea Handler stars and Alex Stapleton directs the documentary “Hello, Privilege. It’s Me, Chelsea”. A documentary about white privilege through a Chelsea Handler filter.” The reactions to this film seem to vary. Plenty of talk on society and politics in this episode. Bob and Akil were surprised at their own opinions on the film. Not unlike the surprise Kevin Hart felt when Chelsea asked him if anyone died inside of him. Has anyone ever died inside of you? If so call (202) 224-2541 and give extensive details to any voicemail or person that picks up the phone. From Orange County, California to Antioch, Tennessee to the guiltiest of white privilege pleasures…Oktoberfest. How does the author of “Uganda Be Kidding Me” cope with the white privilege flashlight in her face? You might have already written a blog post about it. Watch this on Netflix. Get it. Keep on Doccin’

The trailer.

Good words.

Jolly Roll. Goodnight Nashville.

Tim Wise.

This happened.

Shorties 40: Weber Cooks Rice-a-Roni

Don’t get your heart burned in those sunken, glazed, eyes. Felicia and Bob return for another appetizing suggestion from Chef Steven Reed. A non-conventional Thanksgiving side-dish that you might want to consider. This week we discuss, “Weber Cooks Rice-a-Roni”. Cheap eats for college students. The cheapest thing ever to come out of San Francisco…with a Utah twist. Steven Reed brings the Utah passion to your microwave. Easy on the lotion and Keep on Doccin’

Weber Cooks Rice-a-Roni.

The only website you need.

Song origin.

Episode 108: The Two Escobars

Let’s go down, Doccalo. Down to Colomba during a time where soccer and notorious drug kingpins excelled in pride and influence. Two different Escobars with a similar background on two different personality paths. Andres Escobar would become a rare talent on the soccer field and a national treasure. Pablo Escobar would become a patron saint of rappers and a national treasure in his own right. Drew and Bob knock down another sports doc with one of the more well regarded flicks in the ESPN film oeuvre. We rap about “The Two Escobars” by Jeff and Michael Zimbalist and it doesn’t pull many punches. A fascinating and dangerous time told through the lives of two notorious Colombians told from the Colombian perspective. We’re still working on getting a Gucci Mane interview. Maybe this movie could have used talking heads of twenty plus rappers tearing up while talking about Pablo Escobar. Also there’s a lot of soccer. Good soccer. Did Andres sit on Pablos knee in a Colombian “Prison”? Such rumors are rude and we won’t support them. Who’s doing the cocaine now? Seriously. We want to know. Keep on GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!!!!

Here’s the trailer.

Hindsight.

Ouch.

Reading this is required for entry into the Cartel.

Shorties 39: Weber Cooks Chili Cheese Nachos

This month leading to Thanksgiving all Shorties are dedicated to the culinary arts. One specific culinary master in particular. At a particular university in a specific classroom in Ogden, Utah. A chef by the name of Steven Reed made 4 short “How to” videos on “can to microwave” cooking that will burrow into your heart. Hot tips on steamy Thanksgiving ideas all month long as we also debut the newest Documenteer, Felicia. This week Felicia and Bob discuss the first in the “Weber Cooks” viral series, “Weber Cooks Chili Cheese Nachos”. Turn the heat on high and Keep on Doccin’

Weber Cooks Chili Cheese Nachos.

The place.

Dolly’s “Rocky Top”.

Episode 107: Häxan: Witchcraft Through the Ages

It’s been a long and unsettling Creeptober October and as we roll into the week of Halloween we go into the witchy side of things. To do that we will go back, Marty. Back to 1922 Sweden with a film that contests the claim that “Nanook of the North” is the first documentary. Angela and Bob spook out with the entertaining silent historical film by Benjamin Christensen “Häxan: Witchcraft Through the Ages”. A glorious historical telling of the history of Scandinavian perceptions of witchcraft and the persecution of those condemned as witches. Funny, scary, and actually quite impressive. Best of all YOU GET TO READ WHILE WATCHING IT! FUCK YEAH!!!! This film is free (as it should be) and all over YouTube. A variety of links below. The Rats & People Motion Picture Orchestra from the Swedish Film Institute version of Häxan is the bed music for much of this episode. We hope you enjoyed Creeptober. May every house in your neighborhood have full size Peanut Butter Twix and bags of Haribo gummy candy. May every Halloween party be flooded with sexy Werner Herzog costumes. Try not to shit your pants if you can help it. Keep on Doccin’

The version we discussed.

The Burroughs/Jazz version

Original version.

The medieval book that inspired the film and many years of mass murder by the church. You can download the PDF for free.

Shorties 38: Ghislaine Maxwell’s Talk at TEDx Charlotte

Ok, creeps. Jonni and Bob close out their block of Creeptober October Shorties with one that stars a real creep. Bob kind of tricked Jonni with this one. Jonni didn’t pick up on the name, and this Shorties ep started off being about one awful thing, but in reality it was truly about another fucked up thing. Environmental Disaster + Elite Sex Trafficking Conspiracy = one ranty ass episode. We watched an unbelievably boring TEDtalk by the notorious Ghislaine Maxwell that we are calling “Ghislaine Maxwell’s Talk at TEDx Charlotte” and if that name doesn’t ring a bell then put it into a search engine and start reading about some awful shit. We already know the truth about Jeffrey Epstein’s so-called “suicide” and that evidence can be found on our 100th episode. What is the truth about Ghislaine Maxwell doing a TEDtalk years after she was named an accomplice in victim testimony at Jeffrey Epstein’s rape trial? TEDtalks have featured too many privileged shitholes pushing an illusion of genius and TED hosting a sex trafficker of underage girls is going way too far for something so boring that pretends it’s great. Fucking Morgan Spurlock has done a TEDtalk if that tells you anything. It’s time to rise up and #CANCELTEDTALKS ! Life will be more bearable without them. It will stop what Bob did to Jonni in this episode by halting people recommending TEDtalks to you. If anything, this particular TEDtalk probably hurts effective climate change solutions from taking hold more than it helps. That alone is worth your time! Enjoy this plus-sized “Shorties” episode if it’s possible. Keep on cancelling TEDtalks.

Here it is and it’s very very boring.

This guy was closely associated with Epstein and is probably a child rapist and also did a TEDtalk.

More evidence of getting rid of TEDtalks, these outweigh any good TEDtalk

Episode 106: The Mothman of Point Pleasant

BOO DAMMIT BOO! Thanks for sticking it out through Creeptober October and to make it up to you we won’t discuss horse fucking too much this week. We actually get a little more “Halloweeny” because we are hitting up an infamous cryptid from the valleys of western West Virginia. Ginger and Bob hit up Seth Breedlove’s 2017 documentary “The Mothman of Point Pleasant”. Expect a bigger focus on the paranormal in documentary form in the near future. We got no issue with the Mothman. We hope he takes us up in his lonely arms(?) and flies us towards a building full of dangerous chemicals. We can make out when we get there. Maybe put on some jazz…. Roll up a hog’s leg…. Run a warm bath…. and talk all night about the five dicked pig of Paducah.

You can find this on Prime or buy it to support indy directors. Keep on making love to the paranormal.

Here’s the trailer.

Mothman Festival!!!!! 

Here’s the trailer to the very average “Mothman Prophecies” 

Mothman has a wiki page. That’s how you know he’s real.

Shorties 37: Fresno Nightcrawler

Creep out! We’re going on a creepy crawl, but quite frankly, we don’t think this creature is creepy at all! In fact we are impressed with it’s confidence and “take charge” attitude. You can tell by the way they walk that you probably can’t even handle the (what the kids call) “fierceness” that this modern day cryptid brings to these California streets. Jonni and Bob happily discuss the hottest cryptid of the 21st Century. The one and only “Fresno Nightcrawler”. The Fresno Nightcrawler is the feminist icon this world doesn’t deserve. Let Bob and Jonni convince you of this magic and why it deserves your creepy love. Creepy in the best way! There are many versions of this CCTV clip, we particularly like the Vanessa Carlton version. We actually couldn’t find the link that we also included in the discussion, but any CCTV Fresno Nightcrawler footage would do. I’d walk a thousand miles just to be with Fresno Nightcrawler tonight.

Fresno Nightcrawler, Vanessa Carlton edition.

Oh shit, this one has Tiny Tim on it.

GOAT.